On Relationships
When most of us see / hear / think of the word RELATIONSHIPS, the thought which comes to our mind is a relation with a man / woman which is more than friendship, a relation of intimacy (physical / emotional /social), a relation of commitment maybe leading to marriage..
And this thought holds true for many people I have come across in my life at various junctures...
Life changes so fast... it was so much fun in school, and being a part of convent girls school.. everything was like a fairy tale... everything was always seen with pink glasses.. nice .. happy ending.. all well... everything was easy.. life, love, career, family .. all of it... Me and friends... being a big fan of fairy tales.. always thought and believed we will find true love (whatever that means)
And now true love... doesn’t exist for me and I believe for many others too.. yes companionship does exits ...not true love.. I wonder why, maybe because I don’t know what it actually means.. I really don’t??? I REALLY DONT .. ( I am trying hard to find the words to define it... I am thoughtless LOL)
Have we with all our graduate and post graduate degrees... actually graduated past our ability to find or define TRUE LOVE!!!
When it comes to the matters of heart.... were we better off in school???
The general perception is that if you are 30’s something... then you either have a widely successful career or a very loving committed relationship... Its very rare to have it all..
So, what the hell is having it all.... lets see...
According to my logic, one wants the following from life...
Happy family – 1 point (parents , siblings etc etc)
Great Career – 1 point (job profile , salary, satisfaction)
Good social Circle – 1 point (friends to be with)
And a great relation – 1 point
So, to be happy (almost like happily after, one needs to have +4
I have +3 -1 which still equals to +2..
SO why do I feel, and always made to feel or think... that my life adds to a 0 .. when I am a +2...
I met someone today, thinks she has it all... great job, loving husband... well behaved kids... and man.. in the 5 unbearable minutes.. she just went on describing her perfect life.. and feeling sad for my not so perfect +2 life... What a B----
For some people having it all is STILL NOT ENOUGH.. they need people who missed out of the things, (which they think are required) to be Jealous... (and I was getting angry more than jealous)
I told her I have a full time Job at work and at home.. so no time for a full time man!!!
And I think, the key to having it all is, to STOP EXPECTING, life to look like you thought it should be like...
Anyway back to relationships... MY DISCOVERY on relationships is...
There are those, who open you up to something new and exotic...
Those that are old and familiar
Those that bring you somewhere unexpected...
Those that bring you far from where you started...
Those that bring you back...
But the most exciting, challenging, significant and important relationship is the one you have with YOURSELF...
And if you happen to find someone... who loves the you.... you love... well then that’s just fabulous...
ive noticed ders alwis sumone paar... who luvs the u u luv ... infact they luv the u u r.... its about u luvin the u u are too.... if ur on ur way to dat... its a relationship in itself... like u say ur relationship wid u....
ReplyDeletehahaha , i cant help reading and smiling at your post today . Truthfully I'm in a good mood today , hence explaining my smile and response to your post .
ReplyDeleteNote : According to your logic, I would fail your test miserably !
I'm 30 something and
Zero points for career !!
Zero points for relationship
Zero points for family
Zero points for social life
Things are BAD ! Not that you've not met me in this state before :D ( In fact i'm still grateful to how you got me off the 1st time )
And the truth is that when one hits rock bottom like me , well there is only one way out , and that one way up ! Past experience , a good student of Ms Parveen Sheik and tons of hope !
that in a few years , well , my career will be kicking off , ( finally ! )
That i meet the right kind of gal ( don't laugh , i keep the hope alive )
That i will finally be a good son and taking up family responsibilities
And i can renew my social life. I still cherish and value the ones i have in bombay. I paid my respects to it in May , and i hope to keep the strings going.
Things may not be as rosy , there are always ups and downs , highs and lows ,
But there is expectations , there is hope ...and i just keep smiling at that thought ... keep the dream alive !
hey..amazing post
ReplyDeletelove the word "pink glasses"
RELATIONSHIPS = complicated
more than that they are unpredictable...
they are good when u give in most of the time...
people who have it all...they dont have themselves in the relationships..
its ok to be +2 and happy..than everything no identity...
Way to go IDLI...
ReplyDeleteKeep the hope alive... an belive me your are in a much better position than many I know.. and some even you know (read someone in COLOMBO!!!) you know where you are and where you wnat to be.. some are just clueless or just so damm DUMB and EGOISTIC.. that they dont even see.. forget knowing...
LOve you for your honesty.... and love you more for commenting!!
Well said.. Miss Mixed feelings..
ReplyDeleteI am a happy +2... Yippie!!!!